No arguments over Parathas
Aug 27, 2006 - Sunday
What I enjoyed doing most, today:
Shivani knew that I enjoyed the breakfast, I made yesterday and that I had blogged it. By mentioning this 1 act of mine (that happens once in a while), and not mentioning numerous others done by Shivani (that happens almost every day), I was trying to gain some brownie points. I could have teased her saying that I did a nice breakfast for us and she didn’t simply because the blog doesn’t mention it. But whom was I kidding……ladies are smart!
She prepared wonderful “parathas” for me and I just couldn’t stop eating them. So this gourmet treat was the best part of the day!
What I least enjoyed doing today:
We often have arguments with people. It does not matter if I loose or you win the arguments, I always feel a bit down so why do I argue or rather why do we argue? Because, we have different opinions about the same thing. Why do we have different opinions? Because, our previous experience had been different and successful so we all think that “my opinion is correct because I did it in past and I was succesful”. How come 2 people have different experience for the same thing and still sucessful. It can’t be right….but it is. It is because the environment or perspective (the external conditions) to our experience were different.
Let’s take an example:
Question: How do you eat Dosa (pancake like stuff eaten in India)?
Anwers: North Indian guy will reply -- with fork and spoon where as a south Indian guy will reply -- with hands!
Both are saying right but they are also saying different things. We can argue over this but because we know that the perspective of both answers is different, we understand their answers. In north India, restaurants serve dosas with forks where as in south India, it is a normal practice to eat with hands.
So, often in arguments, there is no right or wrong answers and what we need to do is understand perspective and then start all over again. I am sure it wil lead to a more constructive talk than argument.
I had an argument today and I felt bad but the fact that I was able to understand other’s perspective, relieves me!
What I enjoyed doing most, today:
Shivani knew that I enjoyed the breakfast, I made yesterday and that I had blogged it. By mentioning this 1 act of mine (that happens once in a while), and not mentioning numerous others done by Shivani (that happens almost every day), I was trying to gain some brownie points. I could have teased her saying that I did a nice breakfast for us and she didn’t simply because the blog doesn’t mention it. But whom was I kidding……ladies are smart!
She prepared wonderful “parathas” for me and I just couldn’t stop eating them. So this gourmet treat was the best part of the day!
What I least enjoyed doing today:
We often have arguments with people. It does not matter if I loose or you win the arguments, I always feel a bit down so why do I argue or rather why do we argue? Because, we have different opinions about the same thing. Why do we have different opinions? Because, our previous experience had been different and successful so we all think that “my opinion is correct because I did it in past and I was succesful”. How come 2 people have different experience for the same thing and still sucessful. It can’t be right….but it is. It is because the environment or perspective (the external conditions) to our experience were different.
Let’s take an example:
Question: How do you eat Dosa (pancake like stuff eaten in India)?
Anwers: North Indian guy will reply -- with fork and spoon where as a south Indian guy will reply -- with hands!
Both are saying right but they are also saying different things. We can argue over this but because we know that the perspective of both answers is different, we understand their answers. In north India, restaurants serve dosas with forks where as in south India, it is a normal practice to eat with hands.
So, often in arguments, there is no right or wrong answers and what we need to do is understand perspective and then start all over again. I am sure it wil lead to a more constructive talk than argument.
I had an argument today and I felt bad but the fact that I was able to understand other’s perspective, relieves me!
posted by Rajal at 3:11 PM
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